Those days when everything goes wrong

You wake up and feel the pain for having had a bad night of sleep. You go to work. You receive a message saying there’s no light in your house ‘cause they cut it off – apparently, you forgot to pay the energy three months before. You notice you lost your debit card when you try to pay for your lunch. You have an argument at the phone with your best friend, it doesn’t end well. At 9pm you get home, you go for the door, then realize you forgot your keys at work. During all the day, you had by your side your long-time friend, the never ending headache.

Those days when everything goes so wrong that you start remembering everything that’s going wrong in your entire life. How you miss your vacations and now have lots of loads of work, how you managed to lose three of your best friends in this past year, how you have no idea how to deal with someone that apparently really likes you, how you’re becoming an alcoholic, how you have so many hows actually.

And then you.

At the end of this day I noticed. I was with this shirt. I put it on in the morning, took it from my wardrobe, went to work with it, without even realizing it wasn’t mine. I was with your shirt. I was wearing your shirt all day long.

Thanks a lot for the good luck (or should I say thanks for making this day even worse?).

I could end this here, but who would I be if I allowed a shirt to beat the shit out of me?

I have this great friend to always ask for help and went to sleep right away in her house. I contacted the energy company and my house were full of light in the morning after. I took four painkillers at one time and killed my pain in 15 minutes. I apologized to my girlfriend and she apologized to me. I accepted that everybody leaves if they have a chance. I accepted that some people stay, even if you don’t deserve them. And who cares about a lost debit card or about work?

I started to see your shirt as what it really is, a shirt. In the end, she doesn’t even matter.

I’m gonna wear it, as I wore your absence – until I don’t even notice it.


mind over matter

Desde quando e onde eu deixei minha consciência de férias? E por que diabos você tinha que ter os olhos de uma cor que eu nunca tenho certeza exata de qual é? Verdes de manhã, azuis quando você quer, e qualquer cor para mim.

do me a favour and break my nose.
do me a favour and tell me to go away.
do me a favour and stop asking questions.

Too much time on my hands, I got you on my mind. Can’t ease this pain so easily.

When you can’t find the words to say, it’s hard to make it through another day. And it makes me wanna cry, and throw my hands up to the sky.

So understand, don’t waste your time always searching for those wasted years. Face up, make your stand, and realize you’re living in the golden years.

maybe im amazed

maybe im amazed with your skin.

maybe im amazed with your eyes, when they wander through an imaginary sky and then land on my eyes back again.

maybe im amazed with your voice, when it spreads its tones so slowly or when it sings completely aware that im amazed by it.

maybe im amazed with how your presence is terrifying and comforting at the same time.

maybe im only amazed.

I want you to leave, but im dying cause I can’t shake the feeling that you are already leaving.